I don’t mind folding sheets, it really isn’t as difficult as some make it out to be. No, I’m not going to tell you how to do it, or make a video on how to do it, or link you to a video on how to do it. Every time I do fold my sheets, I have a repetitive conversation (in my head) with my ex-husband about how to fold sheets.
I think it is symbolic of how much of an idiot I think he is. His idea of folding, sheets and clothes, is to wind them around his hand into a ball. Clothes then get shoved into drawers, which only get halfway pushed in, if at all. And clothes are always spilling out of the drawers.
So why do I have this repetitive conversation? I can’t change the outcome. He isn’t going to magically learn to fold sheets or clothes. And why do I care? I’m not even married to the man anymore! OCD, unresolved issues. He is still Wendell’s father, so I still have to deal with him from time to time.
When he comes to visit Wendell, every 3 or 4 months for a week at a time, my anxiety increases ten-fold as I worry myself sick about every little detail. I painstakingly write out detailed instructions for administering Wendell’s medication each day, I even have a pill container and I label every day with the correct date and it specifies am and pm (YES I have OCD). I give a day by day menu of pick and choose items. I suggest activities for after school, places to go, (other than shopping every day). I send books and toys and games and movies and CD’s.
I do these things for my own peace of mind, and in an effort to reduce the number of texts and phone calls while he cares for his son. It never works, he doesn’t read anything, he doesn’t listen to anything. I do not have peace of mind, only pieces of my mind are left at the end of the week when Wendell returns.
And when he returns, he is usually sick. I send off a healthy kid, I get back a sick kid. I send off a kid who understands (for the most part) no means NO! I get back a kid who pushes and pushes, because dad most likely (definitely) caved in on one of my rules. Wendell was tube fed until 2010, and eating by mouth is still a major ordeal. It is one of those things if you let him get out of a meal once, he expects it every time. It always takes us 4 to 6 weeks to retrain Wendell following the week of damage done by his dad not following the rules.
Dad takes him shopping, nearly everyday because he is too lazy to play with Wendell, or do any of the suggested activities, play any of the games I’ve sent, or read any of the books. He’s either sitting in front of the television for hours on end, or they are out shopping. He’s the “fun dad” and I am the mean mom. I can’t compete with that.
So, I obsess and have repetitive conversations in my head, about folding sheets. It’s what I do, it’s how I work myself up into a tither every time I fold the sheets. My solution, just have DJ fold the sheets and I won’t have the problem. This man KNOWS how to fold sheets, I never had to teach him, he just knew. He always, just knows.